Who Says You Have to Sleep With Your Spouse?


I’m finding myself curious, about what seems to be a growing trend, of married couples who choose not to sleep together. (I don’t mean sex, I just mean actually sleeping). I’d never known couples who don’t sleep together, at least no one that does it simply because they prefer it – my grandparents had separate bedrooms, but that was because ones snoring always kept the other awake.

A very close friend of mine, and his wife sleep separately, but it started out as just being respectful since he was such a restless sleeper, but now it’s just what they do. (I’m not entirely sure that she is crazy about the arrangement though) Then I visited a close family member recently, and he and his girlfriend had just gotten a new apartment, and they each had their own rooms. I was initially concerned that there was something wrong in the relationship, they are only in their early twenties, and no snoring, or health issues exist that would prevent them from wanting to share a bed.

When I asked them why they do it, and they both said it just works out better this way, he has his room the way he wants it, she has hers her way. She keeps the bedroom too messy for his taste, and they just decided that instead of arguing all the time about it – it’s just better to each have their own rooms. Makes sense I suppose. They told me that another young couple they are close to have it that way as well. I started to wonder if this is something that’s becoming more popular, or am I just out of touch in this area? Now today, I came across an article showing that “Sleep Divorce” could be the answer to insomnia.

When I was married I know I would definitely have been seriously offended if my husband suggested that we sleep separately. I’m not sure how I’d feel about it now, I’m quite used to having my bedroom my way – and to myself – that I wonder if it’s not such a bad idea after all. What do you think?


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